Archive for social media

One of the more powerful concepts I have found through coaching numerous families is transparency. While not high on the priority list in our culture, it is vital within our homes.

Depending on our background and personality, transparency can either be easier or harder for us. For those who have a hard time saying no to our family members, transparency is an incredibly freeing tool. For those who really depend more on right and wrong and telling the truth, transparency helps those around us understand and draw closer to us.

Why is transparency so important?

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The gap I find between parents and their kid’s perspectives never ceases to amaze me. Parents often believe everything is fine, they are connecting, and that their kids are close to them. Meanwhile their kids share with me feelings of frustration, loneliness, distance and hurt. Who would of thought there was such a disconnect. It made sense when I began to seek my kids’ input and insight on the subject, for this was the case with them as well.

Coaching families across the country, I believe the problem stems from the Paradigm of Wisdom vs. Perspective.  Given our age and experience we can look at our kids, the paths they are on and the things they are doing and see the flaws, issues and elements they are missing.  As a result, we often see ourselves as right and minimize our kid’s thoughts ideas and perspective. Given this, we seek to impart our wisdom and insights to our kids in order to protect and help them. Read More →

Boundaries and Consequences: The Reason We Believe in Them and the Impact They are Having on Today’s Kids

(Part 1 of 2 blogs)

OK I know the title already has you frustrated with me!  I understand I was once in your shoes, but all my time doing research and coaching adolescent’s means I cannot duck this sensitive topic even if I desire to….smile!

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I Am a Twenty Year Old College Student Who Rarely Uses Social Media & I Am Concerned About the Effect of Social Media on Young Adults

Sean Parker, the former president of Facebook, says that the thought process behind creating Facebook was “How do we consume as much of your time and conscious attention as possible?” He even goes as far as calling it a “social validation feedback loop.” The entire idea behind social media websites is how to get people to become dependent on the information or validation they get from using this source. Today social media is one of the most heavily relied upon mediums for young adults. They don’t just use it to keep in touch with friends. They use it as a place to post what they did, see what their friends did, watch the newest viral videos, follow celebrities, and much more. This has become such a norm with teens today that they don’t exchange phone numbers or emails but look each other up online and friend them.

So why am I a twenty year old college student who does not have anything but a Facebook page that I never use? Read More →

Social media is one of the more challenging issues parents face as it seems to take our kids away from us and often leads to conflict. Recently I read an article that gives us all pause to reconsider our dependence upon social media. The title says , “Yes, using Facebook may be making you more lonely.” What about social media affects our kids so that they are feeling lonely?

Parents often ask me questions about limiting social media use, rather than the deeper questions regarding the reasons their kids are so engrossed with it. It is in these questions where we find lasting answers. If we understand what drives our kids’ use of social media, we will discover numerous ways to address and alter the outcome without conflict. Read More →